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Bulging Tummies & Jiggly Thighs FTW!

4/7/2011

8 Comments

 
I've been spending a lot of time exploring the body-positive, fat-positive, and alternative bodied yoga communities lately and I have to say that it is so incredibly empowering.  Between that and studying Dr. Linda Bacon's book: Health At Every Size: The Surprising Truth About Your Weight, I am having all kinds of revelations. It's pretty incredible, actually.

I thought I was in a great place about my body, and I was. But every day, I am reaching an even more self-empowered, self-loving place and it's due in large part to the inspiration all around me. 

I originally started reading about the HAES method so that I could support my future students with methods supported by an already well-established body-positive community. I thought I understood it pretty well, but digging deeper into the science behind it has been really inspiring and eye-opening. 

Yoga allowed me to feel comfortable in my skin and connected to my body. Every time I step on the mat, I become more familiar with how my bones support me, how my joints move, how my muscles feel when they are working to support me in a pose, or lengthening and releasing in an opener.  I play with sensation all of the time, but it seems that with all this attention I'd been giving to the inner workings of my body, I've also been ignoring the visual representation of self that I show the world. How much attention have I really been giving to how my body LOOKS, rather than only how it feels.

I used to believe that it was really important for full figured yoginis to avoid mirrors in their yoga practice. Now, this wasn't a shame based belief, but rather my own experience which had told me that what I feel in my body when I'm properly aligned in a pose, may not look in the mirror, the way it looks in my mind. I found mirrors to be distracting for this reason. Because my body doesn't look like what I pictured a pose should look like, I found them to draw my focus in a negative way. But, what I've learned is that it isn't the mirror that is the problem - it's the idea that a different body doing yoga is so distracting. The reality is that EVERY body looks different, doing yoga or anything else, so what better way to honour the unique shape of my body than to see it with a clear, non-critical eye?

This morning, after my morning shower, I stood in front of a mirror, naked and looked at myself - really looked. I looked at the bulges above and below my waist, my "fat rolls". I looked down at my thighs and the way they wiggle. I lifted my arms out to my sides like I do in Warrior II and really looked at the parts that hang down, my "wings".  I looked at every tiny wrinkle that I could see, and I felt my belly. 

And then, it occurred to me to ask myself one very simple question - "Who decided that any of these things about a body were 'unattractive'? The infamous they? What exactly is unattractive about a wrinkle?  What quality does a fat roll have that could possibly cause it to be seen as ugly?" I engaged every part of my logical brain, actively TRYING to come up with a reason to dislike any single part of my body. And the most amazing thing happened! Nothing. That's right. I couldn't think of ANY reason to see these parts of my body as unattractive - by anyone's standards.

When I really stopped to think about all of these things that society calls imperfections or even flaws, all I could see was parts of the body I inhabit, the body that I love. I just couldn't think of a single logical reason why any part of me should be considered unattractive. What an epiphany! They are wrong. Whoever they are. Just because they think these things about my body are unattractive and just because there are societal misconceptions about beauty, doesn't mean I am obligated to agree with them, does it?  Definitely NOT!!

So with this new awareness, I realized, looking in the mirror, that I LIKE all the parts of my body, not just the ones accepted by them.  And if they don't, then it's their loss. 

My belly gives me softness and cuddliness. My thighs hold me and support me and give me a comfy place to sit down when I'm on a hard surface. My skin and many parts of me are super-soft. I think that's pretty cool. So... to them, I say...
"Bulging Bellies and Jiggly Thighs For The Win!"
8 Comments
FaerieRebecca link
4/7/2011 12:57:31 pm

lisa, this is so true! Who the he'll are <b>THEY</b> to shame my gorgeous body! I have become so appreciative of my body just being around Dave's grandmother. It's a struggle for her to use the bathroom--she has to have help for daily activities. My body is strong, graceful, able to walk, move, bend, do karate and yoga, and dammit, I can get up and go to the bathroom all by myself. My body is a miracle!

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Lisa Papez link
4/7/2011 01:04:31 pm

Rebecca,

Yes, yes, yes! Sometimes, as individuals, we get so caught up in the 'image' that's being constantly shoved down our throats by people who have nothing but profit and power to gain by keeping us down - that we forget how miraculous we really are.

Namaste,
Lisa

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Anna Guest-Jelley link
4/7/2011 01:28:33 pm

Love it! FTW, indeed!!

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Andrea link
4/7/2011 08:44:37 pm

I'm sitting here, tears welling up in my eyes. Such honesty and beautiful words... this is so inspiring for women of ALL sizes. Thank you, Lisa.

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Kim link
4/7/2011 09:06:30 pm

I agree with so much of what you've written. As I've said to you through the time we've known each other...we walk such a parallel path, grrrl.

There is beauty in movement. Any BODY doing yoga...and dare I say, do it well...looks beautiful to me. Fat or skinny, I don't care, there is poetry in asana practice.

This movement that my body can do (whether or not I can stretch as deeply or do a pose as perfectly) makes me feel beautiful...

You are beautiful, Lisa...your weight, your bulges and jigglies aren't all you are.

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daynya
4/7/2011 11:54:03 pm

Oh my god, YES. I love this. I knew when I saw you post it, before reading it, that I'd love it. But when I read it, I really loved it. I completely know what you mean, about the stepping onto the mat. When I do, I fall in love with my body a little bit more. I've just picked up a copy of HAES, and I cannot wait to dig into it. Thank you for writing this!! xo

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Amelia link
4/8/2011 02:34:30 am

Gorgeous post, Lisa! I have also done a 180 on the mirror thing. I used to hate them in our yoga room but now, they just are. I can choose to look and use it as a tool or keep my focus inward. It’s up to me and either way, it has no effect on how I feel about myself. Well, I guess I DO let it affect how I feel – sometimes, I take a look and think: wow, I look awesome in this pose :)

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Lisa Papez link
4/8/2011 02:14:33 pm

Thank you all so much. You have no idea how incredible it feels to be surrounded by such a loving and supportive community (whether here in person, or virtual).

You are helping make my dream come true.

/mushy moment

I feel truly blessed.

Namaste,
Lisa

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Images of Lisa Papez, The Fat Yogini provided by Michele Mateus Photography (from the Body Love Now photo project - 2016)
Body Positivity Yoga™ and The Fat Yogini™ were created in 2011 by Lisa Papez. 
Teaching Yoga for All Bodies™ was created in 2014 by Lisa Papez
Teaching Outside The Mat™ was created in 2016 by Lisa Papez
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